The early stage of a relationship has a very special type of thrill. There's no better feeling than discovering that you have chemistry with someone, and then gradually getting to know each other in increasingly intimate ways.
However, as great as the getting-to-know-you stage of a relationship can be, nothing beats the long, sustained joy of being in a healthy, happy relationship that lasts a long time. The mutual love, attraction, and appreciation that serious couples share can bring out the best in both partners, enhancing life in numerous ways while fulfilling each partner's romantic needs.
Of course, there's a dark side to this as well. Many couples stay together in spite of the fact that they really don't belong with each other. They may fight often, they may harbor secret resentments, or one or both partners may even have a wandering eye. Who knows why such couples stay together?
There are a few very simple things that separate successful long-term relationships from those which probably shouldn't exist in the first place.
1. Similar health philosophies: When one partner exercises daily and eats well while the other gradually lets his or her physical appearance decline, this can cause some bad underlying tensions in a relationship. In the healthiest couples, each shows respect for the other by staying healthy, fit, and attractive. Letting yourself go is a sign that you just don't care enough-and it won't be long before the other partner starts looking around at other potential mates who do take care of themselves.
2. Maturity: In a successful long-term relationship, it's essential for both partners to be on roughly the same level of maturity. Of course, in many cases, this has nothing to do with age. It's more about the extent to which the person is self-reliant and respectful to others. When one partner is more mature than the other, it's possible for the mature one to have a positive influence, but in many cases the disparity just causes tension.
3. Lifestyle and philosophy: While it's important for both partners to have their own separate lives, it's also good if both have similar ideals about what a happy and fulfilling life looks like. For instance, if one partner is a homebody while the other likes to hit the clubs as often as possible, they may find, over time, that they're not the best matches for each other. Meanwhile, it is possible for two partners to be of different philosophical and religious persuasions, but being of a single mind on these matters certainly can't hurt.
4. Sex drive: It's no secret that many couples have difficulty keeping the sex life consistent and interesting over the long run. This can become a huge source of tension, especially when one partner is less interested in sex than the other. And because many couples are reluctant to talk about these matters, sex drive imbalances can be major wellsprings for the types of underlying tensions that can cause otherwise healthy relationships to fall apart.
